The Realization

Current mood: nervous

I have been hit today with the "oh my goodness, life is changing, has changed and will change" feeling. Never a bad thing, just looking around... I start my new job Monday and I am really nervous. I have no idea why, I just am. I am sad that I won't be home anymore but very excited about making money to pay things off and pay for our wedding, etc... I couldn't sleep last night- i went to sleep around 3:30ish in the AM it was awful. I was tired and went to bed at 11pm, and tossed, turned, came into the living room, then i just laid there. Thinking of EVERYTHING! That is the things that bugs me most about myself~ I have to have a plan for it all. Somethings are better unplanned, or unstressed about. But- leave it to me. I am thinking so far in advance as to how we will get off the ship to take wedding pictures if my dress will get wrinkly or not. I am also thinking of when we buy a house, I want my kitchen a certain why and want a specific layout! UGH!! Then I kept thinking how I am going to lose weight etc...

I am looking forward to Christmas this year. Christmas was always a holiday I liked but the past of christmas' were not the best. The last 2 were great, but the before that- awful!!!! This year I really want to make is special for everyone. We are getting a couple of angels from the Angel Tree this year. I had always wanted to do that. Ally is at an age, when it will be lots of fun. We really want holiday guests to come stay and enjoy the winter with us.

anyway- just realizing a lot has changed in the past 2 months- our address, our location, our DL's, our additudes, our budget, our eating habits, our prayer habits, our relationships, our jobs, Ally. It's all good!